Rules for Rules

Something we are often asked about is rules
We believe you should have as few rules as possible
and as many as you absolutely need.
As a learning coach I need to spend 
most of my time as a consultant and not a warden.  
So for home we have 3 simple rules.   
These 3 rules easily flow from school time to family time
When I see behaviors that are causing a problem, I will handle it with a few questions.

"Is this something you can work out with your sister?" 
"Do you need me to get involved or can you fix this on your own?"
"Hmmm, this doesn't look good to me.  
I'll have to do something about it.  I'll get back with you." 

We can practice problem solving with our children without a bunch of rules that we have to constantly enforce. If a child causes a problem, they can own it and fix it. 

 This way I can sit back and ask lots of questions.  
I don't have to police and keep track of who's breaking rules. 
I can look at it from a more positive aspect.  
"Is this causing a problem for anyone?"  
Here is a great breakdown of how to 
hand problems back to our children,
from Love and Logic. 

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