Tuesday

To Question or Not to Question....



.....THAT is the question. 
Why work on questioning skills when 
it's just easier to tell your kids what to do??
The answer is:  Adults that are effective  
with young people ask a lot of questions.  
It's effective because the adult is asking the child 
the questions that the child should be asking themselves

Children should be asking themselves, 
"Do I want to work on math or Language Arts first?" 
 So, as the Learning Coach we're left to just 
tell them what to do or start to 
train them to think for themselves. 
Take a look at the list to give you ideas 
on how you might start to create an independent thinker.


Statement
Question
Grab your books for the car.
Are you carrying your books with or without a book bag?
Start on math!
Do you want to start with LA or Math?
No, you can’t skip history today.
What do you think will happen if you skip history today?
We need to keep up.
When do you think you can be caught up?
No, you can’t go to the movie until you’re done.
What time is the show?  Do you think you’ll have your work done in time?
Let’s get started.
Do you want to use pencil or pen?
You need to do 3 lessons today.
How many lessons do you think you can finish today?
Don’t do it that way.
Do you think that will work?  I don’t think it would work for me.  Let me know how it goes.

 
 

Thursday

Practice makes perfect? You decide.


It was one of the last evenings of summer. 
We had a lot of extended family staying with us for the weekend 
so we thought it would be a perfect time to play 
Capture the Flag.  
Teams were divided and the game began!

There came a point when tempers were flaring 
and "That's not fair!!" was the cry from both teams.  
As one of the adults playing, I'd like to think 
that I was above the petty tantrums 
that were taking place.....but 
I started to get annoyed and heated as well.  
 The game came to a swift end 
with players on both sides quitting and walking away.  
We all just headed to bed.  
I certainly didn't feel good about how things went down. 
 The next morning you could tell that 
cousins weren't as trusting as before.  
Some still had hurt feelings.  
As we finished dinner and the group was wondering 
what to do for the evening, 
I piped up and said, 
"Let's play Capture the Flag!"  
They thought I was joking but I wasn't.  
I knew we could keep working at this 
and figure out how to play a fun game 
without breaking into hurt feelings and tantrums.  
Several of the adults gave me a 
look that said, "Are you crazy??"
 Maybe I was.  
But I believe in Practicing


Practicing and repetition help people perform at higher levels. 
 And don't we want our students performing at higher levels??  Yes!! 

So take a look at some of your problem areas.  
Identify them and then create procedures around them.  

Practice those procedures for as long 
as it takes until it becomes a routine
The great thing about kids not following through on their schoolwork.....or getting a late start.....is,  
it's a chronic problem.  
And we love chronic problems because 
it give us something to work hard at and 
PRACTICE!! 

Don't be discouraged when you have to re-teach 
how you want math assignments completed, 
just practice the procedure again. 
Stay calm and know that this is 
a great life lesson for them.  
If we take the time to practice these little things, 
they can become a great boost 
to the effectiveness of our day!

For the record.....when we played Capture the Flag 
the second evening...it wasn't perfect 
but it was CONSIDERABLY  better 
and more fun than the first time! 
We realized that we had to be very clear 
with rules to start off and make sure that 
everyone was on board.  
We look forward to playing it again 
instead of NEVER playing it again! 

Procedures lead to Routines which lead to Successful Days!


Anytime you visit the airport 
you are going to be put through a series of procedures.  These procedures help security and airlines
 keep everyone safe.  I've now been to the airport so many times that it's become a routine.  
I know what shoes to wear. 
I know what I need to do with my electronic devices.  
I even know how to use my seat as a flotation device!

We've been helping families school at home 
for over 8 years now. 
In our experience,
 the number one problem schooling at home,
is not discipline;  
it is the lack of procedures and routines.

Just like the airlines have their set of procedures, 
so should your school room.
I believe in starting the day out strong!
Let's take a look at a couple of places to start:
  • Waking up
What does that look like at your house?  Do you wake them up?  Do they have alarm clocks?  Are beds made?  Do they dress before breakfast? 
 
Once you know what your expectations are, 
then you make it a procedure, 
then  you practice it.   

So for example:  
 Tonight, at 8pm, call the kids into their bedrooms, have them get under the covers and tell them we’re going to practice waking up in the morning.  Then show them what you want it to look like.  For example:  “When mom wakes you up, make your bed, get dressed, visit the bathroom, and meet us in the dining room.”  Have fun with it and do it 3 or 4 times.  That’s a ‘getting up procedure’.  Practice it for however many mornings it takes until it becomes a routine.
   
  • Breakfast
What does that look like at your house?  Does everyone eat together?  Are they on their own for cold cereal? What time is breakfast served?   



Breakfast time is very casual at our house and you’re pretty much on your own.  So I’ve just set the procedure:  Breakfast time is from 7- 7:30.  Get what you need to hold yourself till lunch.  If you miss the breakfast hour at our house, You might be hungry until lunch.

  • School Work to be Corrected
 Dad corrects the math work at our house.  So we walked through how he wanted to see her assignments done.  
 
He wanted to see the Unit number and lesson number (1.2) along with page number.  That way he could quickly see where she was at and not even have to bother her later in the evening unless he needed to clarify or reteach a concept.
This made everyone happier in the evening.

 Nothing replaces practice and repetition when we want things to become automatic.  If you help your kids practice the routines you need to run school smoothly they actually become more confident and willing to do the things you ask.
 
If we don’t have procedures in place to practice and establish the way we need things done then everything becomes a discipline issue because it can feel like they are deliberately undermining their own learning.  We find ourselves out of our job description, because we begin to
 nag, plead, and beg our kids to do their work.
 
If you’re spending most of your time nagging, pleading, begging, you’re just a zookeeper….not a learning coach.

Procedures are not rules to broken.
Procedures are steps to be learned.  

There will still be days when it seems like you're just trying to keep your head above water.....On those days remember: you can use your seat as a flotation device.

2 Keys to Becoming an Effective Learning Coach



Webster defines Effective as
adequate to accomplish a purpose


What if  I don't feel adequate?
Another definition of effective 
that I do feel like I can pull off is,
prepared and available for service

I can do that. 
But I need 2 things in place before 
I can be prepared and available for service. 

Schooling at home is not easy. 
But we persevere even when our student/child balks at a request, a procedure, a choice.  We persevere when a son doesn't 'want' to do this anymore. 
If you believe that your student has the ability to learn, 
you can stay the course!

Do your job ~ Be Effective
Be prepared and available for service.


Wednesday

Turnabout is Fair Play

"I'll be waiting in the car. 
Thanks!"
I turned to Dave and said, 
"Did you hear what she just did?"

 
We knew that our daughter needed to be somewhere tonight. 
But what we didn't know is that we would be on her time table!

We are always talking about setting high expectations 
 for our kids. 
We do that with powerful words and statements

"Thanks for taking care of that.
and walking away. 

"You're welcome to be with us 
when you've finished your work. Thanks."
and walking away.

When we assume compliance from our children by making a statement followed by "Thank you",  we up the odds that they focus on the request and not on whether they want to do it or not. 
Well, it even works on moms!

I did not feel like jumping up from my seat and running my daughter to where she needed to be right at that moment. 
But when she said, "I'll be waiting in the car. Thanks!", I found myself hurrying to get my shoes on!!  She had already moved on out the door and left me with nothing to say.  Since we have a pretty good relationship, I was happy to comply for the most part. 

Requests like this with our children are a good baseline to determine the strength of the relationship.  
If my daughter was left sitting out in the car and I wasn't going to budge, it should be a clear signal to her that we've got some problems to work on.   

Saturday

Every Day



I can think of few statements that are truer than this when schooling at home.
If you ever wonder "why?" or "what was I thinking?" or "how soon can I be done?"
This short video may help change your perspective.

It's valuable to think about the memories you're making right now.
Memories aren't just field trips and science experiments. 
It's your everyday routines, too.

Friday

Thanks for Thinking

We continue to talk about the power of "Thank You" and the expectation that it sets. 
One of my favorite artists has some great prints that I think go along with setting high expectations in the school room. 
You could take any of these and add a "Thank You"
Thanks for thinking!
Thanks for going with the flow!

And this one with the bird and french fry?
Well, that's for me. :)
It reminds me of In N Out Burger!

Oh and this one....
Well, it says it all, right?
 

Reading IS cool!! 
She has it in a girl AND boy!
I personally do not know this artist.  
This is not a paid advertisement. 
I just simply love her style!

Wednesday

Using Games for Wake Up Work

Another great idea for Wake Up Work.  

How fun to have the dominoes 
always set out and a worksheet

How about a bucket of Lego's in the school room?  
Same idea.  
They pull two out and do the math. 


Kids can be productive first thing in the morning and get into 'learning mode' while you finish up the dishes or tend to other children. 

Monday

Avoiding School Work


In our DEJA VU workshop, we addressed how to help kids who avoid their school work.
Because Avoiders are overwhelmed to begin with, going through the Daily Plan each morning or the night before is very important.  
 For an Avoider, you might even expand that idea with a flow chart or hourly schedule.  They need to see all the things that they DO have time for.   
Schedule breakfast, lunch and dinner and all other extracurricular activities. 

  
The principle is that they see where the time is spent and that it is doable.  Don’t use the schedule as something to beat them over the head with.  You don’t have to stress out if at 9am they’ve already missed something.  It’s not the hourly schedule that we’re trying to execute but the overall day to do all the things that need to be done and the activities that we want to do.  

Here is a great printable, hourly schedule
from iheartorganizing,
if you need a head start.  

Tuesday

Objectives



If students know what they are to learn, 
you increase the chances that they will learn.  
Focusing on objectives makes the difference in student achievement. 
Objectives help me teach and guide with the end in mind.
In every K12 lesson the objectives are written so clearly and succinctly that as a learning coach, I can see and understand the assignment with my student.   
Before each lesson, I go through and read the objectives with Emma.  Sometimes she reads them to me.   
This is one of our procedures.  
This helps us both become focused on what will be accomplished in the lesson.  
Reading through the objectives is a simple way of setting an expectation.   
The expectation is "Please describe the main achievements for the Han Dynasty."

I love working from the foundation 
of what the objectives are for each lesson.
Objectives state what the student is to accomplish.  
When given a task, it always feels better 
if I know what is expected of me.  
I can be successful if I know that I am responsible for learning.

I use the daily plan in the OLS 
to see what is on the agenda for the day. 
I then go through each lesson and write down the objectives.  
I like to see them all on one page.   
I look through the teacher guide or student guide to see what additional assignments there are besides the final lesson assessment.  
I spend about 20 minutes on Sunday and 
fill out the objectives and assignments for the week.  
Having an Objectives worksheet with me throughout the day means that I can ask lots of questions as I breeze in and out of my child's study area.  
"Any questions on the pH scale?"
"I haven't seen the Voyages of Zheng He worksheet yet."
"As soon as I see your Reading Guide filled out, you're welcome to go to Volleyball practice."

This is one way to start working on 
independent learning with a young student.
It's also helpful with the student who is already independently doing their school work.  
I can easily stay on top of where they should be and then lovingly guide them back on track when they forget.  ;)  

Knowing what the objectives are gives me a starting point 
to guide them to what they should be learning.  

Download the Objectives Worksheet Here.

 

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